New Year's Resolutions! (We all have to make em right??? :) )

1. To freakin lose 20 pounds at long last! Man..with the alcohol, eating the good food(by good i mean fattening), and not really putting 100% into my workouts i have gained and not lost any weight this year...let this be the year!!!

2. Sign up and complete a Full Ironman....most are soldout but even if it means signing up for one next year and starting my training this year...i need to do it!

3. Get engaged (crossing my fingers!) and start the wedding planning craziness! I hope to maybe even be married in 2011 :)

4. Save money like ALOT of money!!!!...since i will have to pay for #3 myself i need to get my act together!!!

5. Start saving even more money so that hopefully in 2012 we can buy a house or condo!!!

6. Learn a new sport or workout..i love finding new stuff to try every year whether it has been crossfit, team in training, muay thai, body works, etc. Keeping it fresh helps me to never get bored with the same ole' monotonous schedule and routine!

7. I still really want to take violin lessons...this may not be the year i have time for that, but i'll kepp putting it every year til i do it!

8. Go to church every Sunday

9. EAT HEALTHIER!!! Kinda goes with #1, but man my bf eats so bad that i get sucked in with my lack of self-control..so maybe the goal should be SELF-CONTROL!

10. Minimize my cussing...i know i make it sound funny when i add it to the occassional dramatic story (haha), but i still need to try and stop!

11. Read more! I miss reading..i love the way it makes me feel..nothing like a good book!!!

12. Be the best girlfriend (love), friend, worker, Christian person i can be!

Now here was last year's and what i succeeded and still have yet to do!

2010 To-Do List

• Take violin lessons (ADDED TO 2011)
• Become a personal trainer/get certified (KINDA PUT ON HOLD FOR NOW)
• Reach fitness goals (lose 20 lbs and tone up) (DIDNT LOSE THE 20 LBS, BUT DID REACH SOME GOALS)
• Do another half ironman and sign up or complete my full ironman (DID HALF MARATHON AND SOME MUD RUNS, 5K'S AND OTHER RACES)
• Learn to cook (at least) 20 more dinners (I LEARNED AT LEAST 15 NEW DINNERS)
• Eat much healthier (I TRIED BUT DIDNT DO AS GOOD AS I COULD OF)
• Pay off credit cards (I DID IT!!!!!!!! AND IT FELT AMAZING)
• Get my own place or move into condo (I DID IT!!! AND IT FELT EVEN MORE AMAZING AND FREEING AND THE BEST!)
• Save $5000 (I DIDNT DO IT, BUT I DID SAVE AND PAID OFF THE CREDIT CARDS AND ALL THE NEW PLACE STUFF AND GOT A PUPPY WHICH WAS ALL WORTH IT TO ME!)

From Prada to Nada....

Pretty interesting..don't know that i agree with her attitude completely..but it musta been nice while it lasted! Always be prepared and as a woman always have your own money and a backup plan!!!!!!

From Prada to Nada
Marnie MacLean, 39, Los Angeles
Every month since I graduated college, money would magically appear in my bank account. It was enough to pay for the mortgage on my four-bedroom house in the Hollywood Hills, all the bills, a $2,000 LeMond bicycle, a running supply of Crème de la Mer, kick-ass Prada boots and five pairs of $29 Cosabella panties at once (I couldn’t decide on one color). I got my highlights and nails done at fancy salons, went to the theater a lot, traveled to Europe first-class and bought yet more things I didn’t need without looking at the price tags. I was one of those people you hate: I lived off a trust fund. It never occurred to me that one day the money wouldn’t be there, until suddenly it was gone.
On December 11—four days before my 39th birthday—I was taking a bath when I got a call from one of my oldest friends. “Bernie Madoff was arrested for fraud,” Jenny said between sobs. “My money is invested with him. What does this mean?” Until that moment, I’d never even heard of Bernie Madoff; all I knew about my money was that, whenever I overspent, I could call the Big Finance Guys and ask, “Could I get five more g’s this month?” I told Jenny to call my mom, whom I’d always considered financially savvy.
A few minutes later, the phone rang again. This time it was my mom. “Jenny has to speak to you—all her money was with Bernie Madoff!” I blurted. I heard mom crying. “So was all of ours, honey,” she said. “So was ours.”
I was so shocked, I couldn’t speak at first. “I’m so sorry, Mom,” I said, finally. And she answered, “No, I’m so sorry for you. Your money is gone, too.” My husband, Neil, who was standing next to me, took the phone and told my mom, “We have each other—Marnie and I are always here for you. We’re all going to be OK.” All I could think was, What is going to happen to us?
The second we hung up, I jumped on the Web and read about Madoff. I found out he founded Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities, L.L.C. and had conned people out of more than $65 billion with a Ponzi scheme—a scam that uses newer investors’ money to pay high rates of return on the older investors’ money. When the economy crashed and everyone wanted out, Madoff was caught after confessing the fraud to his sons. In June, a judge sentenced him to 150 years in prison.) For legal reasons, I can’t reveal exactly how much I lost, but let’s just say it was in the millions.
I’m pretty sure that if I’d seen it coming, I would’ve gotten a job at some point in the past 20 years. Instead, I spent my time acting in plays and taking improv classes and voice lessons. Often I felt like I had no purpose in life. I tried to find one by getting a master’s in spiritual psychology. I saw an endless slew of New Age healers and psychics (funny, no one mentioned this was in my future). I never brought in a real paycheck, and it didn’t matter: I had all the money I needed and hope that later I’d figure out what I wanted to do when I grew up. And then in three seconds, “later” arrived.
At the time, Neil and I had been married for a month. We’d met at the dog park two years before, where I was charmed by his Scottish accent, skinny rock ‘n’ roll look and wicked sense of humor. Our backgrounds couldn’t be more different; he’s a camera grip from a blue-collar family in Scotland. My family always had money. Our fairy-tale wedding cost more than he earns in six years.
As I sat there, gasping at the computer screen, I turned to Neil and said grimly, “I guess you thought you were marrying someone else.” Without skipping a beat, he said, “Can’t miss what you never had.” And then he added, half-jokingly, “Hey, if we lose the house, we can get an RV and park closer to the dog park!” We hugged, and he said, “Marnie, we’ll survive, even if it’s on the cheap.” For some reason, that wasn’t very consoling.
A few days after I got that phone call, I went for a walk on the beach with a close friend. I was depressed and scared, but it wasn’t until that day that I really cried. I wore this pricey wool hat from Barneys that I loved. Somehow I left it at the beach, and when I realized it on the way home, the tears began. To me, the hat was my former life.
I spent the next few weeks drowning my denial in bottle after bottle of white wine. The stress eventually landed me an overnight stay in the hospital; my stomach was in such knots that I felt like I was getting an ulcer. I realized that I had to stop running away from the situation and confront it. It’s a good thing the Scots are known for their money-hoarding ways (isn’t MacFrugal a clan or something?), because I had a lot to learn.
Neil and I are doing everything we can to keep our home, including looking into refinancing. His income is paying the mortgage, for now, but we might have to downsize; nothing is certain anymore. We’re finding ways to cut back, like getting cheaper car insurance and eating at home instead of going out. I’m planning a clothing swap with 10 girlfriends (though I think I’ll keep the Cosabella panties) and doing my own nails and highlights. We’ve returned some of our wedding gifts for store credit that we could use to buy more stuff. Recently, we had a dinner party. Costco did the catering.
Maybe you’re rolling your eyes right about now and thinking, Ohhh, poor little former rich girl. Believe me, I realize I’ve had a good life so far, and I still have the house, one source of income and my whole life ahead of me. My dear friend’s mother, a 78-year-old diabetic, had exactly $8 left to her name after Madoff made off with her nest egg. She’s had to borrow from friends just to pay for her medications.
Even if I’m relatively OK, though, I’m still angry—wouldn’t you be? I’m furious for myself, my family, my friend’s mom and the thousands of other people who lost their investments, along with the charities and do-good foundations. And, yes, I miss my money. Especially the security it gave me, though now I realize that security was never really there.
In my quest to live a life of less frivolousness (not like I have a choice), I’m hoping to find more purpose and security in myself. Someday I hope to look back at this time and realize it pushed me to be a better person—a full-fledged adult who is engaged in the world and not living days that circle around shopping and other material pursuits. But for now, I’ll just say—
Rot in hell, Bernie Madoff.

Vegas Half Marathon

We did it! My love's first race! It wasnt fast, and it was freezing but it was FUN!

The difference a Dog makes!

Two years ago, Dana Jennings found out that he had an aggressive form of stage-III prostate cancer. His wife and two boys were supportive, but what really helped him through his fight was his 12-year-old miniature poodle, Bijou de Minuit. “I had radical surgery. When I got home and I was lying in bed, she would jump on the bed and lick my feet,” Jennings says. “Other times, she would walk over and put her snout on my side. She was trying to give me her presence. She realized it was strange [that] Dad was in a bed.”

Jennings, now 53, was particularly struck by the fact that his dog’s own health was failing—she had epilepsy—but she still seemed to be enjoying every moment of her life. Jennings blogged about that, how he and his pet were both determined to get better. Eventually, that post landed him a six-figure advance for a book called What a Difference a Dog Makes: Big Lessons on Life, Love and Healing From a Small Pooch, published in November. “In a weird way, this book is an unexpected gift I was given after being sick,” Jennings says.

It’s not entirely surprising. The literary world is lapping up dog books, with a record number of volumes on bestseller lists in 2010. A search on Amazon.com turns up three dozen first-person dog narratives published in 2010. This new genre even has a name: the “dogoir.” That’s in addition to the countless doggie children’s books, training books, breed books, cookbooks, even psychology books. In the past, “dog books didn’t get on national bestseller lists,” says Publishers Weekly senior editor Dick Donahue, who wrote a column about the phenomenon in November, noting seven recent fiction and nonfiction bestsellers. “That is something we can credit Marley with.”

He’s referring to Marley & Me, John Grogan’s dogoir from 2005 about his relationship with a hyper yellow lab. The book went on to sell a staggering 6 million copies and was made into a hit movie with Jennifer Aniston. “People came out of the woodwork with their own dog stories,” says Susan Canavan, executive editor of Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, who published two dog books this year. “And it made editors, writers, and publishers think they can cash in on the popularity of dog stories.”

The core audience for these books—dog owners and lovers—is a dream demographic. Americans own 77.5 million dogs and, despite a bad economy, most pet owners have not cut down on spending for their pooches, according to the Pet Products Manufacturers Association 2009-2010 National Pet Owners Survey. “I think dogs in our lives have taken the avenue kids have 20 years ago, where we’re much more involved in our kids’ lives,” Canavan says. “I feel like that’s what’s happened with dogs.”

Grogan is well aware now how influential his book has become. “No one was more surprised than me,” he says, adding that he’s used the paycheck from his book to buy an 18-acre farmhouse in Pennsylvania. “There are a lot of [dogoirs] out there right now,” he says. “When I wrote Marley & Me, I didn’t think of it as a pet book. It was really my family’s story with this dog—I never thought of it being in that genre, let alone creating a genre.”

A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM

This is sooooooooo not me (I'm a workout-a-holic!) but it's so FREAKIN FUNNY!

A WOMAN'S WEEK AT THE GYM

Dear Diary,

For my birthday this year, my daughter (the dear)purchased a week of personal training
at the local health club for me. Although I am still in great shape since being a high school football cheerleader 43 years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go ahead and give it a try.

I called the club and made my reservations with a personal trainer named Belinda, who identified herself as a 26-year-old aerobics instructor and model for athletic clothing and swim wear. My daughter seemed pleased with my enthusiasm to get started! The club encouraged me to keep a diary to chart my progress.

MONDAY: Started my day at 6:00 a.m. Tough to get out of bed, but found it was well worth it when I arrived at the health club to find Belinda waiting for me. She is something of a Greek goddess - a thinly built female, dancing eyes and a dazzling white smile. Woo Hoo!!

Belinda gave me a tour and showed me the machines. I enjoyed watching the skillful way in which she conducted her aerobics class after my workout today. Very inspiring! Belinda was encouraging as I did my sit-ups, although my gut was already aching from holding it in the whole time she was around. This is going to be a FANTASTIC week!!

TUESDAY: I drank a whole pot of coffee, but I finally made it out the door. Belinda made me lie on my back and push a heavy iron bar into the air then she put weights on it! My legs were a little wobbly on the treadmill, but I made the full mile. Belinda's rewarding smile made it all worthwhile. I feel GREAT!! It's a whole new life for me.

WEDNESDAY: The only way I can brush my teeth is by laying the toothbrush on the counter and moving my mouth back and forth over it. I believe I have a hernia in both pectorals. Driving was OK as long as I didn't try to steer or stop. I parked on top of a GEO in the club parking lot.

Belinda was impatient with me, insisting that my screams bothered other club members. Her voice is a little too perky for early in the morning and when she scolds, she gets this nasally whine that is VERY annoying. My chest hurt when I got on the treadmill, so Belinda put me on the stair monster. Why the h*** would anyone invent a machine to simulate an activity rendered obsolete by elevators? Belinda told me it would help me get in shape and enjoy life. She said some other s*** too.

THURSDAY: Belinda was waiting for me with her vampire-like teeth exposed as her thin, cruel lips were pulled back in a full snarl. I couldn't help being a half an hour late, it took me that long to tie my shoes. Belinda took me to work out with dumbbells. When she was not looking, I ran and hid in the restroom. She sent another skinny cow to find me. Then, as punishment, she put me on the rowing machine -- which I sank.

FRIDAY: I hate that cow Belinda more than any human being has ever hated any other human being in the history of the world. Stupid, skinny, anemic, anorexic little cheerleader. If there was a part of my body I could move without unbearable pain, I would beat her with it. Belinda wanted me to work on my triceps. I don't have any triceps! And if you don't want dents in the floor, don't hand me those stupid barbells or anything that weighs more than a sandwich. The treadmill flung me off and I landed on a health and nutrition teacher. Why couldn't it have been someone softer, like the drama coach or the choir director?

SATURDAY: Belinda left a message on my answering machine in her grating, shrilly voice wondering why I did not show up today. Just hearing her made me want to smash the machine with my planner. However, I lacked the strength to even use the TV remote and ended up catching eleven straight hours of the Weather Channel.

SUNDAY: I'm having the Church van pick me up for services today so I can go and thank GOD that this week is over. I will also pray that next year my daughter (the little rugrat***) will choose a gift for me that is fun like a root canal or a hysterectomy. I still say if God had wanted me to bend over, he would have sprinkled the floor with diamonds!!!

Thanksgiving...Grateful!!!!!!!

I love November. Even though us Californians dont have "traditional seasons" i still see the beautiful changes in the weather, and the leaves, and the attitudes of people that remember the real reasons for Thanksgiving and Christmas! To help those less fortunate and really remember all the things we truly do have to be thankful for!!!

Here is what i am thankful for:

-God and church and my bible study group and girls(and having the right to worship freely because so many other places in the world you cannot)
-Paula and her family thats adopted me...(the best friend a girl can have)
-Lawrence...the true love of my life
-my family that i still talk to (sadly i dont have a fully supportive family but thats ok)
-my Lily...cutest pup in the world (to me)
-my friends..old and new...i love them and they all add that extra something to my life)
-having a job
-having my own apartment
-having a car or means of transportation
-my health (i do not take for granted that i am healthy and that i can walk and breath and live!!)
-Tivo! (that is supposed to be my funny one...i just REALLY LOVE MY SHOWS!!!) but to my credit i now get to watch Oprah everyday which i truly believe makes me a better person because she inspires me to be better and grow as a person!!!!!
-Forgiveness...im grateful for forgiveness in all its forms..thank you Jesus!

The other LOVE OF MY LIFE!

This is Lily Bean......my sweet little Beagle/Jack Russell/and possibly a little Weiner Dog mix. I adopted her on 8/29 and that day my life forever changed! She is my practice child :) My buddy, my companion, the reason i havent slept in past 6am in 2 and a half months...but i just freakin love her sooo much! And Lawrence loooooooooooooooooooves her i think more than me which doesnt even seem possible!

I love Pink. I think she’s so cool because she has this tough kickass persona, but her lyrics are so deep, relatable, REAL! She sang the below song on Oprah which she wrote about her breakup with her on/off/on-again love Carey Hart. What she said before she sang resonated with me because it was so true..and I had heard the same thing in a church sermon about the “20 Non-Negotiables in a Partner” . We make these lists of all the things our significant other must have, but WAIT…do we ourselves possess these qualities? I have often thought this about myself, after looking at my list. Pink said the same. Her dad had told her..”You want all these things..make sure you have them yourself!” She said she was so busy looking at her husband’s flaws that she realized she was ignoring or in denial about her own. The love that the couple have is real and strong and was still there though throughout their split. After this realization that neither of them were perfect, BUT both were willing to work together to be better people for each other and most importantly themselves they got back together. I love their story not because it is perfect, but because it is real…and REAL LOVE is the kind that lasts…..

I feel like when you know the back story these words become more meaningful, and her voice is so raw you can feel her emotions! Love it!

I Don't Believe You lyrics
By: P!NK
I don't mind it, I don't mind at all
It's like you're the swing set, and I'm the kid that falls
It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried
We come to blows and every night
The passion's there, so it's got to be right, right?

No, I don't believe you
When you say don't come around here no more
I won't remind you
You said we wouldn't be apart

No, I don't believe you
When you say you don't need me anymore
So don't pretend to
Not love me at all

I don't mind it, I still don't mind at all
It's like one of those bad dreams when you can't wake up
Looks like you've given up, you've had enough
But I want more, no, I wont' stop
'Cause I just know you'll come around, right?

No, I don't believe you
When you say don't come around here no more
I won't remind you
You said we wouldn't be apart

No, I don't believe you
When you say you don't need me anymore
So don't pretend to
Not love me at all

Just don't stand there and watch me fall
'Cause I, 'cause I still don't mind at all

It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried
We come to blows and every night
The passion's there
So it's got to be right, right?

No, I don't believe you
When you say don't come around here no more
I won't remind you
You said we wouldn't be apart

No, I don't believe you
When you say you don't need me anymore
So don't pretend to
Not love me at all
Oh, I don't believe

I love this song too...

I guess this band isn't Christian but i heard this song played by one of the singers at church and it touched me..then i found an article that said they aren't Christian but if the song makes you feel a certain way then its all about what you take from it!

I love it!

Show Me What I'm Looking For Lyrics
Wait, I'm wrong
Should have done better than this
Please, I'll be strong
I'm finding it hard to resist
So show me what I'm looking for

CHORUS
Save me, I'm lost
Oh lord, I've been waiting for you
I'll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for…oh lord

Don't let go
I've wanted this far too long
Mistakes become regrets
I've learned to love abuse
Please show me what I'm looking for

CHORUS
Save me, I'm lost
Oh lord, I've been waiting for you
I'll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for…oh lord

Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for

CHORUS
Save me, I'm lost
Oh lord, I've been waiting for you
I'll pay any cost
Just save me from being confused
Wait, I'm wrong
I can't do better than this
I'll pay any cost
Save me from being confused
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for
Show me what I'm looking for…oh lord

Love like Crazy By Lee Brice

I want this kind of love......my favorite part is in red :)

They called them crazy when they started out
Said seventeen's too young to know what loves about
They've been together fifty-eight years now
That’s crazy

He brought home sixty-seven bucks a week
He bought a little 2 bedroom house on Maple Street
Where she blessed him with six more mouths to feed
Yea that’s crazy

Just ask him how he did it; he'll say pull up a seat
It'll only take a minute, to tell you everything
Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I Love You
Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common since
Never let your prayin' knees get lazy
And love like crazy

They called him crazy when he quit his job
Said them home computers, boy they'll never take off
He sold his one man shop to Microsoft
They paid like crazy

Just ask him how he made it
He'll tell you faith and sweat
And the heart of a faithful woman,
Who never let him forget

Be a best friend, tell the truth, and overuse I Love You
Go to work, do your best, don't outsmart your common sense
Never let your prayin knees get lazy
And love like crazy

Always treat your woman like a lady
Never get to old to call her baby
Never let your prayin knees get lazy
And love like crazy

They called him crazy when they started out
They've been together fifty-eight years now

Aint that crazy?

I loooooooooove LOVE!

I have always been someone who loves deeply...whether it be my boyfriend, my friends and best friend, a sports team (haha) whoever and whatever it is...Let's just say i'm a passionate person...lol..If i love you i am going to put everything i have into it. People have often told me "You love LOVE" like it's annoying or a bad thing. I used to think..."Oh no, is there something wrong with me? Is that weird that i'm always smitten? Am i lame?" Then i realized at least in my personal opinion that i love that about myself. Maybe the relationship i'm in works out or maybe it doesnt...but while im in it i am going to give 100% of my heart and hope that they are 'the one' and say "Im going to marrrrrrrrry him" like all the time and if we break up i'll probably feel the same way about the next one! (But let's hope and pray there is no next one!) But i say...Nothing wrong with giving it all you've got everytime!

People's thoughts on Love....

“The surprising thing is how much you can learn about someone when discussing what it is that they love. When I first meet people, I always try to ask them about their loves ― what food do you love, what do you love most about living in the city, what is one piece of music you absolutely love?It's very revealing to hear someone speak about something or someone they love, Their face lights up, you can hear passion in their voice, and you find out what it is that really gets that person excited! It's a great way to get to know someone and see that person in their most positive light.
Jacqueline Schmidt
New York, New York”

“Love has a way of returning again and again, with much less work and with just as much meaning!
Kimberly Ammons
Suffolk, Virginia”

“It always wins. We are all guilty of it! You swore you would never marry. Then it happens. You meet someone who finally understands your family ― someone you can laugh with, cry with, and everything in between. Love takes the win! Kids? Forget about it ― especially in this economy. Who can afford them? Nine months later that baby looks at you like you are the most important person in his world. That's another point for love! You fix the neighbor's car, tie a child's shoe, hold the door for a stranger, return a lost puppy, forgive an old friend. Love remains undefeated.
Jennifer Baglio
Stratford, Connecticut”

“You find you have higher standards than you ever thought you had when you find someone to love and someone who loves you. Love makes people want to grow together and make ourselves better people for the ones we love.
Piper Hyland
Oakland, California”
“As a single mother who was alone for eight years, you would think the most surprising thing about love was that I would find the man of my dreams sitting next to me at my son's baseball game. But the thing that surprises me the most is how much in love with him I am over three years later. I still get butterflies when I see him. Finding love that truly lasts later in life surprises and amazes me.
Fran O'Brien
Saddle Brook, New Jersey”

“It is like a Ninja, popping up when you least expect it and turning your once safe world upside down.
Susie S.
Alexandria, Virginia”

“Love doesn't judge.
Taysha Riggs
Los Angeles, California”

“I had no idea what was going to happen when the "I can't get enough of you" phase ended. I thought nothing could compare. Truth is, I wouldn't trade the intimacy, trust, and comfort of being with my husband for over 15 years for anything. It does get better, deeper, and more significant.
Laurie Ciulla
Ho-Ho-Kus, New Jersey”

Carlos Bocanegra

A reason for us to watch USA Soccer games!

Tropical Getaways

I miss Hawaii and tropical getaways in general!!! That is why Paula and I have decided to go on a Miami trip! Our first time there! Sooo excited...though i hear the humidity is almost unbearable! But i dont think we will care! August!!!!!!!

The Pros and Con's of being 6 Foot Tall!!!!!

Today while looking for a summer dress at the mall i got frustrated...Why you ask? Because every dress i tried on didnt even go over my booty. I couldnt buy any of these cute dresses because they werent long enough! I started to think of all the things that annoy me about being tall...but then i countered that with the things i like! Here is my list i compiled quickly today! :)



Pros:

-I can always reach the top shelf
-My 6'4 HOT boyfriend likes it
-It helped me in basketball and my various sports career (most of the time)
-When i gain or lose weight it doesnt show as much
-You can find me in any crowd and vice versa
-Im slightly unique and can stand out (me being positive about it)
-People always ask if you are a model to which you say awwww ya right no but thank you!
-Some men like tall women
-I can always grab the clothes that most people need that hook thing for at the stores lol
-Not as many people can see my gray hairs
-When i get older and shrink i will still be tall (haha)
-Always being asked "Do you play basketball or volleyball?" Which i dont mind cuz i did!


Cons:

-I have big feet and no shoes fit! (i never find cute shoes)
-You can't wear 4-5 inch heels unless you wanna be 6'5
-You are ALWAYS put in the back row of pictures...then only your head shows, not your cute outfit!
-You know at concerts when you jump up and down to the music..tall people look dumb and awkward when they do that
-I cant date ALOT of guys because im waaaay taller and i care!
-You look Huge in pictures near your little short friends
-If you get fat you look like a big monster
-Dresses often dont even go over your booty
-Pants never fit unless they are highwaters
-I have extra inches of body to workout at the gym
-People use rude words to describe you like: lanky, lurpy, my personal most hated (BIG), giant, huge, etc.
-I personally feel the need to be extra feminine as a tall girl

Im sure there are a million more but thats all for now! :)

Bikini Confidence

http://glo.msn.com/relationships/my-not-so-bikini-body-1533411.story?GT1=49006

I loved this article!!!!!! I wish i could have bikini confidence!!!

Mud Run # 6

I remember someone once telling me i was "too girly" to do the mud run...ummmm have you seen all the sports i have played??? lol Girly girls can be tomboys too! This weekend will be my 6th Mud Run...this one being @ Camp Pendleton! I love them and cant wait for the treacherous 6.2 miles of mostly uphill muddy craziness!!!! Our shirts will say " Dirty Girls....Go all the way!" lol

I'm sooooo happy!

Finally...at long long long last...I will be moving to a place by MYSELF! Sure my boyfriend will be over often, but it is still mine. I cannot wait to have my own space to think, relax, sleep in silence and peace, keep a clean kitchen like i always have with no one else's sloppiness, decorate to my taste and MY TASTE ONLY (My bf will leave the decisions to me), if he wants to watch TV as he sleeps i can go in one of my 2 other rooms...oh the joy!

I cant wait to:

-Decorate
-Buy a new couch and other furniture
-Make breakfast for my man without the roommate weirdos around on weekend mornings
-Be as loud as i want too
-Walk through the house with as little clothes as i want
-Wake up and go to bed on my crazy time schedule without having to be considerate or having someone not be considerate of me
-Cooking sooooooooo much more
-Having dinner parties with my friends
-Having my housewarming party Paula is throwing for me

and the list goes on..........I feel FREEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Love and Forgiveness

Love makes you crazy man!!!!!!!!! All i know is I try to put 100% effort in everyday and hope that I get it back. Somedays are better than others...some weeks are better than others (this week being the latter) but to me it's worth it.

I think everyone knows one of the most important aspects of a healthy relationship is TRUST...but what happens when that has been broken? Is it able to be forgiven and healed? Does time really heal our wounds? I really dont know, but what i do know is that FORGIVENESS feels really good. Everytime i am so so upset over something i read this article and i feel a little more at peace. I also try remember something Oprah once said that has always stuck with me...

“When we forgive it does NOT mean that we tell the person who hurt us its okay, we have just decided that we will no longer be angry and are no longer letting that person have power over us”

Anyways...here's the article :)

Love, Anger and Forgiveness: How To Let Go & Be Emotionally Free Once And For Allby William G. DeFoore, Ph.D.
Anger and forgiveness seem to be opposites, and in many ways they are. You may be surprised to learn, however, that they have a lot in common. If you make anger the "bad guy," you just won't get to the forgiving part. Anger has to be fully understood and released before you get to move on to the freedom of forgiveness. Forgiveness has to be fully understood before you can let go of resentments and be emotionally whole and free.
It all starts with love. We are born with the need to love and be loved, and no one, even the best parents, can meet that need perfectly. Therefore we all feel hurt as a natural part of life. And of course, there are those hurts that are inflicted by abuse, abandonment and neglect, in some cases extreme.
From this pain, fear and anger naturally emerge. It makes perfect sense to be angry when you're hurt. Anger is an important place to visit, you just don't want to live there. Here is where forgiveness comes in. Forgiveness is the process of letting go of anger and resentment so that you can go on with your life. Forgiveness is for you, not for the forgiven. That is essential to understand.
Anger and forgiveness seem opposite, in the sense that anger involves an intense focus on the "wrongdoer," and forgiveness involves shifting focus off of that person and moving on with your life. Yet there are some ways that anger and forgiveness are the same.
How Anger and Forgiveness Are The Same
Unhealthy anger and premature forgiveness both include:
-Judgment
-The "one-up" position
-Dishonoring to yourself
When you are angry at someone and blaming them, you are definitely judging them and putting yourself in a "one-up" position. The way you are dishonoring yourself here is that you are failing to look at your own creative responsibility in the situation. This is the hazard of the "blame game." When you are into blaming others for your feelings, situation or plight, you are making yourself a victim and denying your own power and responsibility.
Premature forgiveness is forgiving someone when you're not through being angry. You are still judging them, and therefore you're seeing yourself as "one-up." You are dishonoring yourself by pretending to forgive in your mind, when your heart and gut are still carrying anger and resentment.
Here are some important truths to remember when you're angry:
-The other person is responsible for his/her actions that triggered your anger. You are not responsible for their behavior.
-You are responsible for your emotional reaction and for your actions that result from your emotional reaction. They are not responsible for your emotional reactions or your behavior that results.
Here are some other ways that anger and forgiveness are the same. When anger is healthy, and forgiveness is authentic, both involve:
-Power
-Release
-Letting go
-No more victim position
-Operating in a container of love
Both healthy anger and true forgiveness involve the power of healthy release and letting go, which takes you out of the victim position. This can only occur in a container of love. Anger can only be healthy when accompanied by some degree of love and wisdom, and forgiveness can only be true when it is based on love for yourself and/or another person.
Understanding Anger
Anger is the most misunderstood emotion. Most people just think it is bad. Here are some common misconceptions:
-Anger is a bad emotion and should always be controlled
-It is possible to be without anger completely
-It is wrong to be angry
-To be angry means to be out of control
-Anger is the same thing as aggression
-When a person is angry that means they are not safe to be around
These misconceptions result from the lack of understanding of healthy anger. Healthy anger is:
-A feeling you have when you're threatened or opposed
-A protective emotion
-Powerful energy that can be used for positive outcomes
-Fuel for effective action
Have you ever taken action about something that made you angry? Think about MADD, Mothers Against Drunk Drivers. They got mad, and took action in healthy, appropriate ways to resolve the problem leading to their pain and anger. Here's the bottom line on healthy anger:
Healthy anger fuels effective action!
Understanding True Forgiveness
True forgiveness is something that only your body can do. Surprised by that? Here's the deal. Anger and resentments are held in the body as well as the mind, and your mind can decide to forgive long before your body is ready. Literally, your body has a mind of its own. Here are some things to understand about forgiveness:
-Forgiveness is not just a decision that you can make in your mind
-Forgiveness requires an emotional and physical release to be complete
-Your body is capable of holding onto anger long after your mind thinks it has forgiven
-Forgiveness does not absolve the wrongdoer—you don’t have that kind of power
-Withholding forgiveness does not hold the wrongdoer accountable—everyone is accountable whether you forgive or not
-Forgiving doesn't mean you have decided that what the wrongdoer did is okay
-You don't have to wait for the wrongdoer to change for you to forgive
-You won't be able to forgive until you have fully examined the depth and extent of your wounds
-You won't be able to forgive until you have acknowledged the full depths of your anger
-Forgiveness is for you
-Forgiveness is good for your health
-Forgiveness allows you to be more loving and joyful
You will know that you have forgiven when your body is relaxed and your breathing is deep and easy—while you visualize the wrongdoer and say, "I accept you for who you are, with all of your best and worst. I no longer need you to change. I forgive you for myself, so that I can be free. I forgive you so that I can let go of resentments and feel love and joy in my heart, mind and body."
Your body will tell you if the forgiveness is complete.
Keys to Emotional Health and Freedom
-Take responsibility for your actions and emotions
-Do not accept blame for anything
-Place responsibility for others' actions and emotions on them
-Do not blame anybody for anything
Here are some thoughts to consider about love:
-Love can be intoxicating, and therefore can lead to unhealthy decisions
-The need to love and be loved is the most powerful force in human nature
-Love is who you are in your spiritual essence
-Conditional love is not really love—it is more about control
-The only real love is unconditional love
-You will always remember those people in your life who have loved you unconditionally
-You are at your very best when you are experiencing unconditional love
Life starts with love. Anger is an inevitable emotion, which can temporarily or permanently take us away from love. When we work through our anger, we can forgive. Forgiveness is a return to love.
The greatest of these is love.

Oprah's Epiphany (my hero)

"Obsession is a way we break our own hearts over and over again before they can be broken by someone else"

Here's where Oprah's epiphany comes in: Your relationship with food and your relationship with whatever is going on in your life; the goodness that you feel and the alignment that you feel (when things are working out well for yourself) is in direct proportion to how close you are to what Roth calls god. Your disconnection from the center of yourself is the reason for all of your problems, including the problem with food.

Oprah continued to read an excerpt from "Women Food and God," the book that changed her life: "We turn to food when we are not hungry because we are hungry for something we cannot name. A connection to what is beyond the concerns of daily life, something sacred. But replacing the hunger for a divine connection with Double Stuff Oreos is like giving a glass of sand to a person who's dying of thirst."

The more you recognize your inner problems, anxiety or discomfort, the better your relationship will be not only with food but of course with your soul. You'll be happier, and the weight will fall off more naturally.